Nobody has ever escaped from Stalag 17. Not alive, anyway.

• Stalag 17
  

Imagine, if you will, that Ted is telling YOU this story and that, as he gets closer and closer to the last sentence , he is whipped up into a maniacal fervor:

And so it is that most of our customers say

"you're new here, how long are you going to stay?"

You would think that the Elevated Echelons of the Evil Empire might pay more attention to the comments received in their Emporia from the very source of their profits! But alas no; that is not the case.

Sales, sales, and more sales please to the definite exclusion of the poor punters we sucked into our clutches just yesterday. You've bought your stuff now GET OUT and free up my office so that I can sell more, more ,more!

You may find this amusing but I'm just a dog and I'm not really qualified in agitated person restraint techniques! But I am fixin to bone up (pardon the pun) on my psyche evaluation courses just in case things get any worse.